Yoga & fat-free yogurt

On Saturday, I taught my first yoga workshop in Charlotte at BeYoga.  It sold out.  31 people.  I was absolutely thrilled.  Floored.  Beyond.  And nervous (very nervous).  I have been studying and practicing Kundalini Yoga since 2001.  I have been teaching since 2006 and have studied with some of the best teachers in the world.  I have taught at colleges, hospitals, in large companies, yoga studios & half-way houses.  But this was kind of freaking me out.  Why?

I have a story about Kundalini Yoga (it’s weird) and Charlotte (it doesn’t like weird).  And I got to experience my Survival Mechanism (fear, thoughts, feelings, body sensations) on loudspeaker . . . “I don’t have the home court advantage.  They won’t like me or the yoga.  Kundalini Yoga is too crazy.  I am too crazy.  The set I picked is too hard.  And the worst, “Maybe I should try and make it lighter.” Meaning, shorten the pose times or do something else entirely.  It reminded me of a conversation I had with my sister-in-law Dana about fat-free yogurt.  It may taste ok, but doesn’t fill you up.  You’re really not getting anything out of it and you’re probably not satisfied after eating it.  And you will probably be hungry really quickly after, because it has no real substance. Our conclusion:  why would you bother with a watered-down version?

Cut to my internal dialouge:  “OK, what’s really going on here?  What do I need?  What do I want out of this workshop and what are my goals for the participants?”  So I got to work.  I got supported by my coach.  I got clear on what I wanted to say and create.  I meditated.  I took excellent care of myself.  And I showed up to teach in my essence (contact me if you want to know more about essence).  The result?  One of the most powerful teaching experiences I can remember.  A room full of open-hearted yogis who got to expercience some full-on Kundalini Yoga.  And to top it all off, the studio has now invited me to teach a regular weekly class on the schedule (details to follow!).

Where is fear getting in the way for you?  How are your “stories” about people, places and things (including yourself) limiting you from the experiences you want?  Interested in having things go differently?  Email me here to get the conversation started.

Manifestation, hippies & Kate Spade

I have a funny relationship with the word manifestation.  Some days I love it, embrace it and declare to manifest people and things like a wizard (and do).  Other days, I find myself rolling my eyes and wondering when “people” are going to get it together and start checking in for life on Planet Reality.  And part of my judgement about manifestation is the “woo-woo” factor.  As a coach and long time student and teacher of yoga and meditation, I am sensitive to being woo-woo.  I recall in 2013 being called a hippie twice in the span of two weeks by two different people.  And it totally freaked me out.  “I’m not a hippie, I have Kate Spade shoes and lip-gloss by Terry!”  What hippie in their right mind spends $40 on lip-gloss (the shoes were a gift and the gloss was for my wedding, but seriously)?  And it’s an interesting conversation.  I’m afraid that people will see me as a hippie or woo-woo and I won’t be taken seriously (can you see I have absolutely no judgment about any of this, hippies in particular?  Good).

Let’s get back to manifestation for a minute.  Mainly, I can’t be with the idea of manifestation when I am in a lousy space.  Because manifestation is really about responsibility.  Responsibility about what we are putting out into the world, both practically and energetically.  Responsibility for our thoughts, words and actions.  If I haven’t slept well, eaten well or created anything fantastic in a while, I have no time to manifest (i.e. be responsible).  However, when “life” is just popping, everyone is smiling, NY is the City I know it to be and I just found a $20 bill in last year’s winter coat:  well, YES!!  Let’s get on board with some manifestation nation!  

The other conversation I mentioned (hippie) is about judgement and things that have a hard time co-existing within me.  My hippie heart with my Kate Spade shoes.  I have a client who couldn’t be with her Chanel bag and her Le Sportsac.  We hold ourselves as fixed objects in our own minds.  We are either/or.  A hippie or a fashionista.  Woo-woo or entrepreneur.    

What would be possible if we embraced all parts of ourselves?  If we really took on creating/manifesting what we want?  Interested in having 2014 go differently?  Email me here to get the conversation started.

Festivus for the rest of us & being human

Ahh, the holiday season. Filled with over-eating, over-spending, travel, family drama and opportunity-after-opportunity to grow and re-create things . . . or is that just me?  My holiday adventure started on 12/18 with a flight to New England with my husband and 18-month-old.  For 30 minutes of the two hour flight, my husband and I were force-fed Chex Mix by said child.  We survived, landed in Rhode Island, and embarked on an adventurous week.

On Christmas Eve, my small friend had a twilight nap on the way to the festivities at my Aunt’s house.  Post-nap was one of the worst hours I can remember with my daughter.  She was exhausted, disoriented, and in general, very unhappy.  My family was extremely supportive, telling Matt and me not to worry.  But after 30+ minutes, we started getting frustrated; nothing seemed to help.  I snapped at Matt.  He snapped back.  I was upset that I was missing out on time with my family (and delicious appetizers).  Also, my niece, who is a few months older than Mirabelle, was running around like a Christmas fairy, spreading smiles and good cheer like it was her job.  And I was embarassed.  I was making my daughter’s behavior in that moment mean something about her as a person and me as a parent.  Her:  an inconsolable brat and holiday downer.  Me:  a crap-tastic parent who can’t comfort/handle her child.  For a little while there, my little family was not “looking” good — in my eyes.  And I realized I couldn’t be with the upset and messy-ness of the moment.

It was a really great opportunity for me to be with things.  And to get curious.  Why am I affixing so much “meaning” on a tired child?  What is it about not “looking good” to others that has me judge myself and my daughter?   How is it going to go for me to make my daughter’s behavior mean something about me (and her)?  In addition to being a yogi and life coach, I am also a human.  A very human human.  And what I love about this work is that I still have my humanity, but I also get to practice other things.  Compassion, altitude, acceptance, tolerance and unconditional love, for myself and my daughter.

Are YOU interested in re-creating your relationships in 2014?  Want to have things go differently?  Email me here to get the conversation started.

Don’t put off the joy

Yesterday I had a call with an amazing client  of mine who was looking forward to relaxing and enjoying life/the holiday season on Friday, after work and the last gift was bought and delivered.  It being Monday and all, I asked her if she was interested in choosing to relax and enjoy her life right now — in that very moment.  And to keep choosing it all week long.  And it was so great for me to hear that because it reminded me of two things:  1.) I put off my joy, celebration and relaxation until conditions are “perfect” (you can imagine how that goes), and  2.) It’s a choice.  What is so interesting to me is that I often miss the “choice” part of the conversation.  We choose everything . . . from who we spend our time with to how we spend that time.  We choose how we relate to people and events.  Every moment is a choice.

I would love to hear what you are choosing for yourself this holiday season.  I invite you to choose it now and see what that creates for you.  Don’t wait for tomorrow, next week or December 31st.  What’s possible in choosing what you want right now?  Need some support in choosing something different for yourself?  Email me here to get the conversation started.

Asking for what you need

Last night I was sitting on the couch with my AMAZING husband, Matt.  It was after 10 PM, so I wasn’t firing on all cyllinders.  Earlier in the evening, Matt ran a thankless errand for me and was explaining what a pain it had been.  I was trying to ignore him when he looked at me and said, “I think what I really need is a little acknowledgement.”  I was touched and moved deeply by the request for a few reasons:  1.) It is really powerful when someone asks for what they need in a clear way;  2.) He utilized a tool we use in coaching that is a beautiful way to bring someone back to their being and call out their greatness;  3.) It gave me the opportunity for me to tell my husband what an incredible man he is and how grateful I am to be his wife.  It was a great way for us to end our day.

Are you getting what you need from your partner?  Your co-workers?  Your in-laws?  Your friends?  If not, are you asking for it?  Interested in re-creating your current relationships?  Email me here to get the conversation started.

Hoosiers

Over the weekend, I watched Hoosiers as part of an “assignment” from my Coach’s Training Program in NYC.  My mother-in-law asked me, “Why Hoosiers?” And I responded: to model “Team.” (I knew it was about basketball, so I was guessing).  After the movie, I got really excited and yelled, “I know why they wanted us to watch Hoosiers!”  And I realized it was for two reasons:

  1. To demonstrate “Stand.”  At one point in the film, the town holds a meeting (wanting) to fire this new basketball coach/outsider.  The star player walks in and makes a statement:  “He goes, I go.”  Stand.  Standing for another human being.  And guess what?  They keep the coach.
  2. This team of young men, with the support of their coach, made the “impossible” possible.  The smallest town in all of Indiana became state champions.  Highly unpredictable, and as a result, created possibilty for thousands.  Powerful.

And that’s actually the work of a coach . . . To support people in creating exactly what they want in their lives.  The things that seem “impossible.”  The things that are for “other people” or just out of reach.  Are you living a life by design?  Or are you at victimized by your lot in life, or your parents, or your education, or your ex (or your fill-in-the-blank)?  Interested in being a state champ Hoosier-style (or Jordan-style)?  Let’s Talk!

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